I guess it’s only fitting that I had a huge rite of passage on Father’s Day. If my ex-husband were here I definitely would have called in reinforcements when my daughter began asking how babies were made. She asked that question when she was four and I was SO not ready to answer. I wasn’t ready to answer tonight either, but thankfully we were in the car at night and she was in the backseat. Something about her not having to see my face as I cringed at each question and tried to keep breathing through the answers made it all easier.
My kid is really smart, so I didn’t think the stork answer would work. Believe me, if I thought I could sell that one I probably would have for the next dozen years. I am concerned that her friends will get to her first if I don’t have, “the talk.” I had to keep telling myself to stop calling it, “the talk” or “the conversation!” OH, there were so many bad moments in that conversation! What surprised me was that there were a few moments when we were both reduced to giggles.
One of my favorite/least favorite moments was when she asked me how we made her. SIGH! I don’t really believe there is any having the birds and the bees conversation halfway. It was all or nothing. For me, that meant keeping it in the context of procreation, not recreation! What was cringe worthy was when she asked about pulling down underpants halfway or a quarter of the way to accomplish the transfer of the sperm to the egg. Her asking “where” it happened didn’t help either.
I never thought of it from her perspective. I think that’s where the giggles came in. When she seemed amazed that her father and I had pulled down our underpants and revealed our “privates” to each other, it was hilarious. I believe her exact response was that it was weird and disgusting! I wish I could remember all of the moments in the conversation.
I will definitely remember that upon beginning to tell her that this was not a conversation to have with her friends, she said, “Yeah, yeah, yeah, privacy…privacy!” I couldn’t help but crack up. She asked when she’d be able to talk about it with her friends, to which I replied around high school. My little imp gleefully piped up, “I’ll shout out that I learned about sperm when I was 6!!”
Of course I am horrified that the explanation might not be enough to satisfy her curiosity. When she asked if one of the boys in her class had sperm, I almost died. Tomorrow we are going right to the bookstore to buy an age appropriate book about reproduction! This is one conversation where I need all the professional help I can get. I know it would be foolish to believe that it is over now. I’m sure this is just the beginning.
I said the words sperm, egg, penis and vagina and I did not die. Good job, Mommy!
I found a link that might provide helpful if you are in a similar situation http://www.webmd.com/sex/features/when-to-talk-to-your-child-about-sex