Sleepwalking Through Life

So if you are tired all the time, are you getting a chance to enjoy life?  I wonder. Sitting here typing, no idea what the heck is for dinner and needing to get moving – that’s what I’m wondering. I’m definitely going to get a cup of coffee before moving onto my next location because I just might not make it today.

I have this weird sensation inside. For all the typical trappings that I don’t have or can’t afford, my life is pretty wonderful. I am doing work that I am passionate about, there seem to be endless opportunities for me to grow and I have a beautiful, healthy and spirited child. Yes, I’m tired as hell…but I don’t think you can take on the world and not get tired from time to time.

As an entrepreneur there isn’t a lot of down time. I’m working when I wake up, after I put my daughter to bed and sometimes even in the middle of the night when I get up to go to the bathroom. Sadly, I am always checking my phone for messages or jotting down thoughts and ideas. It’s hard to turn it all off, but I plan on doing just that in a few weeks.

I have scheduled a week-long vacation for myself. I’m not going anywhere, I’m just going to spend that time having fun and loving up on my daughter. So often I find myself sleepwalking through my life. I’m doing routine stuff over and over again without even realizing it. I don’t take stock in whether or not I enjoy doing it.  I’m just doing it.

Today a woman invited me to go to a racetrack where I could ride along with a professional driver at speeds up to 150 miles per hour. I woke up for that one. I’m going to have to ponder the feasibility of that opportunity. It would definitely be a first for me and I’m sure it would be exciting.

Should it take a major adrenaline rush to wake me up to the majesty of my everyday life? I miss so much being caught up in getting caught up. Maybe I can wake up and ponder the beautiful things that happen every day, like my daughter’s laugh or the sway of honeysuckle in the gentle breeze – even if I’m tired.