My friend called me this morning full of fear. She got some AMAZING news and a huge door opened for her. She said she thought she might pee herself. Yup, that’s a big old dose of fear. It’s ironic. We ask for things, actually most times we beg and pray for them. Once they begin to happen many of us have one foot out the door, heading in the opposite direction. Success is scary. Achieving your wildest dreams can be terrifying.
On a much smaller scale, today I am facing one of my fears. I couldn’t sleep last night and spent the morning with my stomach tied in knots. It’s hard for me to clearly express what’s going on. Maybe that’s why I’m having the physical symptoms of stress and anxiety. As my friend and I spoke this morning I coached her on breathing through the fear. People that tell you not to be afraid, clearly don’t recall what it feels like to be afraid.
When you are scared, there is no switch to turn it on and off. What you can do is breathe, and know that eventually the sensations will pass. It’s that “eventually” that’s the problem. Sitting in the puddle of anxiety can be debilitating. When I’m there I pick up coping mechanisms that don’t serve my interests. Sometimes it’s eating when I’m not hungry, it could be mindless internet surfing and when dealing with people it can look like me shutting down.
I’m learning that fear is just an obstacle put up to see how badly I want something. There have been many occasions when I have turned around at the first sign of that hurdle. Now that I know that I can be scared and do something anyway, I just try to breathe through my fear. If you ever see me standing around like a deer in headlights, it might just be that I am breathing and trying to adjust so I can jump that next hurdle.